Updated: Jan 16, 2019
Didn’t we all get super-comfortable in those marriages or long-term relationships, knowing we were loved even with those extra pounds and that comfy sweatshirt with the stains on it?
But if you’re heading out into the dating world, you’re going to encounter strangers who never knew you when you were hot or cute or ripped. All they see is the now. And even though we still feel like we’re twenty inside, the sorry truth is we’re like ripe fruit, soft and wrinkly. But you CAN do something about it!
So take a candid assessment before you go putting your face online. Here are some things to check:
Body: Would a little weight loss or gym action help? Usually, yes!
Mind: Have you taken time to grieve your loss or are you still bitter, sad or cranky most of the time? (If you don’t know, ask a friend!) Have you cultivated new interests since your break-up? (That’ll be important for all those dates where you have to talk about stuff.)
Presentation: How long since you’ve updated your look? Climb out of those couch potato sweats and go for a more stylish version of yourself. If you don’t know how to do it, ask one of your kids (if you have some). They usually have tons of suggestions for how to make their parental units look better.
If you don’t have any kids, borrow someone else’s for a quick consult. Or maybe go shopping with a younger friend. Oh and don’t forget to check those tightie whities and granny panties at the door (sooner or later, someone new is going to see them).
Karen Haddigan is the author of Secrets of Dating After Fifty: An Insider’s Guide to Finding Love Again.