If you were dating when the pandemic hit, the first day of quarantine probably felt a lot like the game of “musical chairs.” The music stopped and with it, so did dating. Time froze and wherever you were in the dance, you were going to be there for the foreseeable future.
There was the period of initial shock. Was life as we knew it over? If you were single, you were really single now. Alone at home without a social life, with nowhere to go and plenty of time to reflect, more singles than ever began posting profiles and starting to interact online. The dating sites began to buzz with activity.
But then what? Setting up a date was pretty much out of the question. Enter Facetime and Zoom, which have always been an option but not one that many over-50 daters were comfortable using. It was less intimidating and much easier to have a regular phone call and arrange to meet.
Or was it? Lots of singles feel like the first date reveals personalities or physicalities that aren’t what they seemed like online, leaving them feeling disappointed and eventually, burned out from a series of first dates that go nowhere.
So why not use this new and bizarre situation of quarantine to really get to know somebody online before meeting? Use messaging to dig deeper into each other’s values, lifestyles and attitudes. Use Facetime to see and hear them in action. Vet them with your dealbreakers. Check them out for red flags and ditch each other before that first date, if necessary.
If you both like what you learn after an extended “courting” period, arrange to meet up at your favorite take-out restaurant and have a meal together in the nearest park.
Six feet apart of course.
© Karen Haddigan